DISGUSTING SINGAPOREAN STUDENT - guidelines

how many of u little idiots out there
have totally no idea wat ur parents are paying for your education?
its time once again of the year to pay school fees

here's the bill at a glance and how to fully utilise them:

1. Tution Fee/Grant is your BASIC school fee comes in the form of using the school facilities, your lecturer's salary, the school cleaners' salary, the fire extinguishers, gardening
so its time you bully your lecturers, exploit them to the fullest, ask stupid questions and expect intelligent questions, misuse fire extinguishers raising false fire alarms, breathe in as much air-con during lectures and tutorials; also you can pee/shit everywhere in the toilets working the cleaners like slaves; if you like you can also steal some of the tables, chairs, library books and potted plants home. Get your whole family to use the school's wireless internet connection every Sunday's family day, demand the Student Union bring them around the school like a tour guide (refer to section 7)
3. Examination Fee is for your teachers who set up the venue and printing the papers
to make full use of it, u have to take massive amounts of extra paper and string during examinations and take supp papers as much as possible
4. GPA Insurance i guess is for the software MOE uses to convert your academic results to GPA points in reference to your CU points
There's nothing you can do to fully utilise your $3, just imagine buying your educational minister a bowl of fishball noodles twice a year, with all due respect
5. Miscellaneous Fees should be for the school to have extra disposable cash
its a good $23.50, so i guess it'll be good to make the school spend unncessarily like destroying school properties like planting bombs at pavillions and stairways to kill the smokers, having a foreign student Virginia High shoot-out massacre at Engineering School
6. Sports & Wellness Fee probably goes into Enciks working at the Sports Complex, the lousy basketballs, maintanence of the parquet badminton flooring
Make full use of the FREE sports facilities, play basketball, soccer, badminton, tennis, table tenniss, volleyball, run at the track, talk nonsense and bully the Sports Hall uncles make them come out of their air-con room to attend to the minor chores, help them realise their DJ dream by running around half naked in the Sports Hall all the time getting them to make announcements over the PA - totally fun!
7. Student Union Fees obviously goes to the Student's Lounge and the freshman orientation
Join as many SU events as much as possible to get the free t-shirts, i have a cupboard full of them now. call SU ppl Slave Union members and insist they serve you at the lounge, keep getting balls stuck, sit on pool tables, spill drinks at the lounge. bully freshman in school, cut their queues in canteens, laugh/jeer at them and call them names, demoralise them by telling them how difficult school is and they will fail their modules for sure, get them to buy drinks for you, give you massages, extort from them.





P/S: I'm just clowning with the bills, the above is an example of how a disgusting singaporean student will fully utilise the school resources. I personally do not practise and encourage any actions above and will not hold any responsibility if you were to face any consequences following my guidelines.